Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
