I want to stick my p in your. b.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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