its not stalking. its research.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
