she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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