Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
