Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
How external is "for external use only"?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
