I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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