Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
