I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I should be sponsored by Trojan
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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