you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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