hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
