for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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