If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I can't put those talents on a resume
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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