just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
