And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
