But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
