Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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