Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
