No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
