if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
