Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
