the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
