Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
now i know why i became what i already was.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Randomize
