Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
