Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
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