I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
