worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
