I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
