new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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