you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
