I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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