Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
