therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
be right there i have to get my cape
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
