"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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