Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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