She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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