The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
