so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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