u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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