Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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