Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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