Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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