I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
