im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
