He asked me if I "almost moaned"
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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