All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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