Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
