They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
