I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
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