Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
