Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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